Day 61 of 100 - Feeling Good

I love this quote by Dolly Parton, “People always say, ‘You seem to always be so happy,’”  she tells Southern Living magazine. “But I’m not always happy. Nobody is happy all the time. I’m a very sensitive person. I’m a songwriter, so I have to live with my feelings on my sleeve. I have to not harden my heart, because I want to stay open to feel things. So when I hurt, I hurt all over. And when I cry, I cry real hard. And when I’m mad, I’m mad all over. I’m just a person; I like to experience whatever the feeling is and whatever I’m going through. But I have a good attitude. And I was born with a happy heart. I’m always looking for things to be better.”

...and, so, that too is me.  I hate to admit it, but when I get upset, I'm all mad, every part of me is involved in that emotion; and when I cry (and yes, I most certainly do cry) it takes over my entire soul.  I cry hard and deep.  But you don't get to see that.  That side of me is very much reserved and protected.

It takes great strength to understand your own frustrations and pain, accept them as fact, accept them as past, and move on.  Put your game face on, and keep walking forward.  Finding positive in everything around you, allowing yourself to be free of those events, and people, and taking control of your life by committing to being happy - or even moreso, joyful.

Two great videos to make sure to watch are: Ted talks"The Power of Vulnerability" and spoke with Oprah on Super Bowl Sunday.

There is no joy without gratitude, Brene writes "...for 12 years... I have never interviewed a single person who talks about the capacity to really experience joy who did not actively practice gratitude..."

She describes joy as terrifying.... because you could love someone so much, it brings you so much joy, and then the fear rushes in... "when we lose our tolerance to be vulnerable, joy becomes foreboding"....  

She says many of us do not allow ourselves to experience joy fully, because we are too afraid of losing it!!

So, she says if we write things down, practicing gratitude, we end up appreciating the little things and find incredible joy in them.

Another one of her quotes, which resonates with me very deeply, and is also what drives me to practice being strong and confident is the fact that I want my children to be without shame, to be proud of who they are, confident and strong... no matter what that picture may look like:

"You can’t raise children who have more shame resilience than you do. Because even if you don’t shame them, and even if you are actively trying to raise them feeling good about who they are, they’re never going to treat themselves better than you treat yourself. So that’s the bad news and the good news, but mostly the sucky news. If you want to raise a daughter with a really healthy body image, you better love your body as a mother, because that counts way more than looking at your daughter and saying “You’re beautiful and your body is beautiful.” All that matters to her is how she sees you acting with your own body. Which sucks. We can’t give children what we don’t have. We just have to be the adults we hope they grow up to be."

Just last week, my youngest daughter and I were dancing in the kitchen while I cooked dinner.  We were shaking it all over, not worrying a moment for what we looked like, what our bodies were like, nor whether we were good or not.  We were loving the music, and our time together, and that was all that really mattered.  There is no room for negativity in a world where you allow yourself to dance, to love, to sing, and to feel.  So let yourself go, will ya!! ;) In no time, you'll be feeling good....

"Birds flying high
You know how I feel
Sun in the sky
You know how I feel
Breeze driftin' on by
You know how I feel
It's a new dawn
It's a new day
It's a new life
For me
And I'm feeling good
I'm feeling good"

- Feeling good, by songwriters Anthony Newley and Leslie Bricusse