Regrets

My daughter tonight posted the comment "no regrets. just lessons learned".  No Regrets.  That is the quote you see most often.  What is the problem with having regrets anyhow?  Can we not regret what choices we made but yet still look forward and do better in future ?  Why pretend we do not regret it?

Regret is to "Feel sad, repentant, or disappointed over (something that has happened or been done, esp. a loss or missed opportunity)"

So, if we never feel disappointed, how can we truly learn?

I say regrets are okay.  I regret many things.  I regret not finishing my degree when I was 20. I finished it instead while working full time and caring for a full family - that was hard work. Lesson learned.  Now I tell my children - go for the degree, finish it early, finish it fast and you'll be free after to do as you choose...

I regret not staying in athletics at McGill University.  I dropped out because the bus ride home was so long and after working out, I'd get home at 10pm and still have hours of homework to do.  I think I would have been an Olympian, had I stayed with it when I was 20.  I think I would have worked harder to stay in University then, if I had a team to support me and drive my motivation.  Who knows. Learning from this regret, I now workout as much as I can fit in, as I'd like to place first in my age category in my races... not giving it up this time :)

I regret not hiring a drummer and continuing my original music career when we were in the peak of our journey.  We had three original albums, and would have been famous I'm sure :) I regret letting that go too...but from this lesson, I've learned to continue to play, to sing, and to love music - and especially to be proud of those Canadian musicians who have not given up on their dreams- Nickelback, Avril, Alannis, Justin Bieber - they are not deserving of bad mouthing - these guys have gone the distance I did not.

I regret not taking down all the stories my father had told me, as now he has passed and his stories are gone with him.

I regret not seeing many friends who have since moved away, moved on, or have passed on from this world.  I miss them, and wish I could hear them laugh again, see them smile, and tell them how I feel about them.  I regret not having enough money to travel and see them.  I'd be there in a heart beat.  One of key reasons I love to be involved in social networking is that this is my chance to talk to people I would have missed entirely. Thank you for sharing your lives with me, if only a small piece of it is shared, and only online.

So, as you see, although we may regret our decisions, we may not regret the decisions we make afterwards - once the decision is done we must move forward, making new choices which, hopefully, lead you down the right pathways... I am referring to the ones that have brought me to where I am today.

I do not regret choosing Ottawa to be my home town.  I've made some incredible friends here and I love this town. I love sharing my home with my friends and family who come to visit - please come more often.

I do not regret having two children with a man who caused me years of emotional pain, as I love them with all my heart and they are my pride and joy.  I know in my heart that staying strong, and making sure they came first, was everything to seeing them become the incredible people they are today.

I do not regret choosing to settle down in a government job which has given us the stability to grow from, and the home to keep us safe and warm.

I believe taking chances, allowing risks, and living fully, brings about mistakes, disappointments and eventual regrets.  I will never regret the chances I've taken, although I had failed - the loves that I had, although I had lost - and the dreams that I tried for, but let slip away.  For them, I am rich with stories, experience, and wisdom.

Today I am happy, healthy, and rich in friendships. I choose to feel this way - it isn't just granted to me.  I make this choice even while glancing back and thinking, sure, I regret some decisions.  These friendships I now have, and love deeply, I have gathered over the years during my regrettable experiences, despite them in fact.

Today, there is nothing I would regret more in my life, than not taking the time to tell you all, how much I do love you.

In the end, I believe having regrets means we are full with life!

Bring em on!!

xo